My next door neighbour's son, Robert, runs a hot-air ballooning business. Over the winter the balloons have been in storage and a few weekends ago, Robert decided it was a good idea to get the balloons out and inflate them to check them over for damage. The very large field at the back of my house is owned by my neighbour, and is big enough for such a purpose.

Anyhow, being good neighbours ourselves (well we hope we are) the Simmons family went out to help with the unfurling of balloons, inflation, deflation and then packing away of the balloons. Hard work, but wonderful fun. I recommend that everyone should go up in a hot air balloon at least once in his or her lives. It is *wonderful*. Vernon and I did it several years ago, from Worcester. We went up in a *huge* rainbow striped balloon from the middle of Worcester racecourse and went through the clouds. Sitting on top of the clouds at 6500 feet, drinking chilled champagne out of silver goblets is not to be missed and is a truly magical experience. I recommend it!

Back to ballooning in Norfolk. The first balloon to be checked over was quite a small one in ballooning terms, but it was still plenty big enough. As the guys were getting the thing started, I was still in the house at this point. I stood in the dining room, looking out of the patio doors at all of the goings-on in the field. Francis joined me. He wandered into the dining room and gave me his greeting chirrup. I know its Francis without looking just be hearing his particular greeting to me. Francis rubbed up against my ankles and watched what was going on with me.

At this point, from Francis's point of view, aliens landed. Over the 8' conifer hedge, rose a giant red alien. It appeared out of nowhere and got bigger and bigger. Francis decided I needed protection from the savage invader! He immediately flicked out his claws. He didn't just go up on his toes; he went up on to the ends of his claws, like a ballet dancer on pointe. His tail went vertical and the fur on it went out at ninety degrees, so it resembled a bottlebrush. The fur along the entire length of his spine went up, his ears went back, flattened to his skull, his eyes went wide, and his whiskers went forward. He then produced growls and HISSSPITS at 120 decibels, and did the "assume the U-shape of the crab and bounce about in a frightening manner" dance all along the floor in front of the patio doors.

I slept soundly in my bed that night knowing the planet is safe from alien invasion thanks to the fearsome feline warrior that is Francis.

Copyright © Helen Simmons
May 8, 2001