• Cats keep their opinions to themselves.

• Cats don't criticize your mother.

• Cats never question how much you're eating.

• Cats never claim they know how to fix larger appliances.

• Cats understand the importance of beauty sleep.

• Cats are happy to let you drive.

• Cats always look good first thing in the morning.

• One good purr can be worth a thousand words.

• Cats don't complain when you get a short haircut.

• Cats love it when you go shopping.

• Cats never return the gifts you get them.

• Cats are able to keep the romance alive.

• You can let a cat out at night and it always comes back.

• Cats are never late for dinner.

• You can put a name tag on a cat if it shows signs of wandering.

• Cats keep your feet warm.

• Cats are furry things that are nice to look at.

• Cats don't have a Mother-In-Law.

• Cats lick their own private parts.

• The only bottle cats hit is the milk.

• A cat always hits the litter box.

• Better chance of training a cat.

• No matter what your cat drags into your house, you don't have to pretend you like it.

• You never have to spend time with your cat's mother.

• If you ask enough times, a cat may actually listen to you.

• A cat purrs when you serve him dinner.

• It's okay if a cat rubs up against your best friend.

• You don't have to worry about your cat turning into a pig when you host a party.

• A cat knows you're the key to his happiness... a man thinks he is.

• If a cat jumps into your lap, a little light petting will satisfy him.

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