A story by Dusty...

My slave has really lost it. Oh yeah, big time. I was chillin' by my favorite window observing the bunnies taking turns "riding" each other and watching my slave clean the pool. She popped the lid off the skimmer and made a high pitched squealy sound and started jumping up and down! A really big toad, one of those Colorado River toads (the kind you're not suppose to lick) lunged right at her. It missed her clean and landed back in the pool. So now she goes and gets the "net on a stick" thingy and try's to fish it out of the pool. Obviously these stupid slimebags can't get out on their own. Ah success! She takes it over to the back fence and lets it go. Oh, about an hour later I noticed that the toad was back in the pool and let my slave know by appropriately "acking" and assuming crouch position by the window. She went out and got the "net on a stick" thingy again and fished it out and disappeared to the great beyond on the other side of the fence. Bye bye wartmaster! Nope, guess who came back for another swim later that day and brought a friend? Now she is out there trying to get 2 of these monster toads out of the pool. At this point I would have launched them into the great beyond with the "net on a stick" thingy, like that Frogger game. She sees me through the window staring at her. She looks at me like, "Poor toads huh?" I'm thinking, what are you the freakin' Dalai Lama, launch those puppies, let's see if they can fly! She gets them out and oh so gently and compassionately sends them on their way. Just before bed she goes out there with a flashlight to check the pool and lo and behold 2 toads are having a midnight swim. It's very dark and she try's to fish them out with the "net on a stick" thingy while holding the flashlight between her legs but that's just not working. "Enough is enough, let 'em drown!!" Nope, Her Holiness gets the pool floaty and makes a little ramp for them so they can climb out on their own and she goes to bed. In the morning they were gone. They either figured out the ramp or Kody ate them... actually Kody would probably be dead if he ate them and he ain't dead 'cause he is right here licking himself. Hmph, smarty pants toads! Now what I want to know is where the heck is that compassion when I am mewling in agony due to a hunger induced madness because my food dish is almost empty? Hmm? The Flabulous Dust

Copyright © Tambra Jo Gwozdz
July 7, 2001