Dear Cap'n Pine Cone, I have wanted to write to you ever since you requested applications for your latest adventures at sea (whatever a sea is). My brofur Hobbes told me that he went on the voyage last year and had a grand time with the other members of your stalwart crew. He told me of the time someone (he refused to name names) managed to tip over a bait tub and the entire deck of the ship was covered in flopping, silvery fish and everyone was leaping and pouncing and munching on fish for the afternoon. He told me of huge ropes to sharpen your claws and the dark, dark sky with twinkling stars by the millions. He told of dock cats meeting the ship and showing them around foreign cities and something about sneaking into a broken window of a cheese factory and licking holes in huge rounds of cheese. It sounded like quite an adventure, and I'm an adventurous girl cat that would probably enjoy a trip like that. But you see, Mr. Cap'n Pine Cone. I've only just moved into my new home and I was afraid that the Mothership might send a clone that was too good and my new purrrents wouldn't want me back (I did bite my new Meowmy before I realized how nice she could be). So I didn't want to take a chance just yet of having a replacement sent and then returning to find out I wasn't wanted anymore. So right now I'm being a good housecat and following my Meowmy around and talking to her all the time so she doesn't get bored. And when she sits down I jump up and press myself against her leg to help keep her warm (she doesn't have any fur so she must get really cold). I think my fursibs are probably on board with you. The clone that was sent to replace Hobbes is just too funny. He tries to imitate Hobbes lying on his back with his feet in the air, but then when he tries to turn over he can't quite manage it and he wiggles and squirms until he gets his feet under him. Meowmy laughs at him and then he gets all puffy and tries to clean my ears. But I don't let him get away with that, I jump on him and bite his feet. Sometimes he corners me against the wall and I get scared and hissspitt at him but he never growls at me. My real brofur used to growl at me. The Selena clone though, she's good. She knows just the exact way that Selena sits in front of the mirror and watches herself as she grooms her fur. She's a little friendlier than my Selena but I don't let up my guard. When she tries to headbutt me I pop her in the forehead with my paw. We aren't best of friends yet and I don't get invited to snuggle on the bed with her and Hobbes at night, but that's all right. I have my Meowmy to snuggle with, but can someone explain to me what she means when she calls me the “juvie”? Sorry this is so long Cap'n Pine Cone. I mainly wanted to let you know that I enjoy the stories about your voyage and I am going to put in my request for a clone early next year so that I can go too. When I used to live outside I would have to move around a lot at night to keep from getting eaten by things that roam at night. I'm really good at navigating the stars so maybe I could help out with navigating. Have a safe journey Lacey PS: Selena thinks she's some kind of a "moon goddess" (exaggerated rolling of eyes here) and a full moon is expected this weekend. Watch out for any attempts at mutiny. Either than or look for her in front of any mirror on board.

Copyright © Julie Cook
July 10, 2003