My friend and companion, Sandra, fixed fish for our lunch today. I like shrimp and scallops, but Sandra can't eat shellfish of any kind. She fixed salmon for herself. And just to show you how she neglects me, the rice she served me had both mushroom caps and artichoke hearts in it!

Anyway, we really enjoyed our fish. All the cats wandered in to see what smelled so good, but only Gizzi was seriously interested in eating! We fed him bites from time to time -- i.e. whenever that long, six-toed paw approached our plates!

Now Sandra will not put hot food into the refrigerator -- probably a very good idea. Instead, in this case, she covered a plate with salmon (de-boned) on it with another fairly heavy upside down plate. We found a good movie on the "telly" and were busy with it, when "Guess Who" waltzed into the living room with a large piece of salmon in his mouth. I can only guess, but I think he found it, he stalked it and he killed it, and he wanted to show us his prize!

Sandra has all the patience in the world with people of the feline persuasion, but this was to be her next day's lunch! She managed to get most of it away from Gizzi. I didn't ask what she did with it, but I heard her setting some rules for The Giz's future behavior!

She wrapped four pieces of salmon in foil, each holding just enough for a good "snack." Then she came in to see the end of the movie.

Thirty or forty minutes later, she said, "I'll just go put that fish in the refrigerator, Minutes later she was back, muttering to herself. Now there were only three wrapped packages, plus some clawed up foil on the floor.

She found Gizzi and carried his satisfied, bulging body in where she could talk to him. When she finished, I talked to him. We tried to make him understand that this was completely unacceptable behavior. I really thought we were getting through to him. He watched us while we talked, ears twitching occasionally, and only yawned once. But do you know what that cat did then? He BURPED!

And such is life in cat country!

Copyright © Renee Darvin
February 12, 2002

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AUTHOR'S NOTE: And before I get "flamed," I want you to know that the author reserves the right to exaggerate for purposes of a good "yarn." And no animals were harmed during the writing of this story!