Saturday afternoon at about 5:20PM I was walking back from the shops, all that was on my mind was takeaway, Dr Who, and a book I wanted to finish, when I saw a lovely golden Cocker Spaniel running wild on a busy road with no collar. What could I do?

It took four people to lure him into the hallway of my flat - in the end we used a Jack Russell bitch as a "honey trap". Seemed friendly enough, good condition, neutered but no ID. I then learned a basic fact - If you see a stray animal at weekends in London - DON'T take them in. The council don't have animal wardens at weekends, the RSPCA say it's the council's job (My devious niece suggested telling them the dog was limping when found but I worried I might be keeping them from a genuinely sick or injured animal). Battersea don't come out for one dog. The police will take the dog in but can't come and collect him.

By this point I've had to go to the loo and dog has followed me in. Two horrified felines stared out of the bedroom door. I quickly shut them in and returned to the thankless task of trying to sort things out. Finally I thought I must have something to improvise into a lead so I can take the dog to the police. So I made the mistake of opening the bedroom door.....

Of course having been locked in the bedroom for an hour or so, the Furballs first considerations were litter tray and food. And the Dog had eaten some of their IAMS- you can guess how much this incident has cost me in ham - apart from anything else - to apologise!

Needs attended to, they decided to approach the dog... I don't think they've ever seen a dog before because none of my friends have dogs. I had the dog on an improvised leash (a thick scarf).

Dunzi decided discretion is the better part of valour and stayed in the doorway.

Not so for Sarrasine... in she comes, slowly. She gets to about six or so feet away from the dog and stops, stares at him wide eyed and slightly fluffed up. The dog stares back at her.

For about five minutes neither side break the stare… then Sarrasine plainly decides she's made her position clear and starts to wash herself.

Dog growls at her...

She flashes dog a look that says "I am tolerating you because Meowmie says you will be gone soon. But HOW DARE YOU INTERRUPT ME AT MY TOILETTE!"

Dog is cowered down and whining in a second...

Cats 1. Dog 0. (I should have known)

PS: I Did get dog to police for the night. Next morning road is covered with posters for missing dog (His name is Scott) when I called the number on the poster, his owner had been putting up posters when someone in the cab office remembered me taking him to Limehouse police station so she went down and retrieved him. She's just moved into the flats down the side of us and she had him locked in a room even had a sign on the door asking people not to open it but apparently someone can't read. So it's a happy ending.

Copyright © Lesley Madigan
May 8, 2006