Well, the Demon Cat hasn't been well lately. He was diagnosed with bladder crystals and spent several days at the vets getting a catheter and other various horrible things done to him. Then, in protest over the switch to Hill's prescription food, he went on a hunger strike and lost a lot of weight (which only started out at about 10 pounds or so, that's why we call him the Little Guy). Over the past couple of weeks we finally found a food he would eat (Innova canned, CMN-UR dry) and he's starting to put the weight back on. He still wasn't acting like himself though. I don't remember the last time he ambushed anyone and nothing has been stolen in weeks.

Then, this afternoon while I was dusting the living room, I heard this unholy ruckus coming from the computer room. Sadie comes running from that direction to tell me that something was going on and I'd better get in there and stop it. From the way she was acting, you'd think the house was on fire. Being a well-trained pet Mom, I head down the hallway to see what's up Rob is standing near the computer room door and tells me to be quiet and not to interrupt, it's the Finals he tells me. Huh?

It's the Ultimate Cat Fighting Championship Finals.....picture this.....

In this corner, the reigning champion, weighing-in at 18 pounds of jiggling fury...... The biggest, baddest cat in town...Luscious Lucy.

In the other corner, the up and coming challenger, a light-weight weighing-in at 9.5 pounds soaking wet........Demon the Whiny Boy!!!!!

Lucy is laying on her back, all four feet in the air ready to rip her enemy apart. There's a terrible, low moaning sound coming from her general direction, but there is no way that noise is coming from my Lucy. From a mountain lion or cougar maybe, but not from my Lucy.

Demon is sitting up on his hindquarters, arms extended for balance. His high pitched voice raised in a war cry......the pose is familiar....I have it now.....remember Ralph Machio in the Karate Kid? I think it's called the crane or the flamingo or something, anyway.....My Little Guy wants to be a Kung Fu Fighter!!!!!

Then....tag....Lucy lands an uppercut to his jaw...a left, then a right. Looks like the little guy is going down. But wait....the only warning is a slight twitch of his tail...then.... POUNCE!! All four feet right in the middle of the champion's unprotected belly (and such a BIG belly it is too) He bounces on her like a herd of preschoolers on a trampoline. Her evil growl turns to "Ooooomph...you little sh**.....oooww....I'll teach you...mmmph..ow.....I'm outa here!!!!!

And the winner is......Whiny Boy!!!!!!!
He's back...kicking butt and takin' names!!

Copyright © Kathy Hyle
July, 2000