Mrrp Romeo & Juliet!

I iz a bit confoozed. Fangyou for da greetingz. Day woz ferry ferry nise looking catz but ov caws not az gud az eever ov yoo or my own verry self. I am confoozed coz yoo sed to reeply to yor hotmail address but youz hav a alta vista address. Iz hoap I am not sending dis da wrong playss.

Tis troo. My slave iz'bandoning me for for dayz. She iz leavink me wid dat big uglee fing she cudelz insted ov me, an dat idiot dog de ugly thing bort into da *my* terrytawry. Iz will preetend to hayt her wen she getz back an maybee poo in hedr shooz. But I will mayk shor she bringz yoo yummy yummy fings.

Pleez look arfta my slayv, she iz de only won who noez how to get at dat bit riyt behind my earz. She is awlso gud to cudel wiv at niyt, but dont tell her dat.

Mrrp

Shmogg

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