Ollie is in disgrace and I haven't been speaking to him. He presented me with a dying sparrow on Christmas morning. Ted is on holiday, learning how to surf the web and email everyone on his new internet connection. Flocks of visitors have been in to admire his garden window, tiling etc. etc. The cat has been dribbled over by adoring people - he is thriving on all the attention and doesn't even realise that we haven't been speaking. At the moment he is particularly enjoying the attentions of an 8-year-old girl and her parents who are staying with us. Talk about heavy pestering. I keep hearing these shrieks of delight from the bedroom. "Oooooh, Mum, Ollie walked all over my chest and face last night. Oooooh, I just love him."

Mum: "Ollie walked all over me too and tried to crawl under my nightie!!!"

Dad: "That is a cat of great discernment."

After such sickening bouts of flattery there will be no living with Ollie.

Oh God, they've just gone past the window and Ollie is perched on the front of the little girl's scooter. A whole new career could be opening up for the cat.

Copyright © Beverley Dunlop
December 30, 2000