Lying in bed on this very wet and grey Tuesday morning, with Cleo happily nuzzled by my arm, I decided to make an early start of it. It's doubly hard to get out of a warm bed with cats hindering you, not wanting you to leave. Well, such is life.

I got a protesting Cleo to move, after my nose and face had the required washing, and staggered into my study to get the birds up and out from under their protective nighttime veil. Had a bit of trouble getting it off the cage for some reason, but stowed it and headed to the bathroom.

When my female budgie Sandrine landed on my head.

I quickly looked backwards to see I had indeed snagged the cage door into the "open" position. Jacques, too, decided to test the skies. I had a feeling it was going to be a long morning.

Picture if you will (or maybe you shouldn't) a forty year old man, naked as a jaybird, chasing two birds around an apartment, meanwhile trying to keep two cats causing the destruction of said two birds. Not a pretty sight. Cleo and Velvet are both in chattering kill mode, and getting under foot while I'm trying to herd the birds back into the study. It must have been quite a display for people having their breakfast in the Condo next door. Couple this with the fact that Jacques has this habit of landing on the floor and waiting for Cleo to pounce before flitting into the air again, and you have an interesting equation, one expanded exponentially to say the least.

After five minutes of cajoling, pleading, swearing and sweating, the birds are getting tired, and increasingly giving into mother gravity and landing on the floor. Time for battleplan Bravo. Cleo is unceremoniously dumped in the master bedroom's bathroom, and Velvet is flopped into the laundry room. The furious scratching of doors and yowling begins. I'm just about ready to give up, and give up I do. I manage to corral the errant birds into the birdroom and just shut the door. Cleo and Velvet were released from their respective prisons and immediately took up guard by the study door.

I showered, shaved, and being late at this point, just left for work.

Some things are better left unfinished. I wonder if Cleo and Velvet will work out a method of opening the door. We'll see tonight. I'm not looking forward to going home.

Copyright © Bill Mason
July 17, 2001