The Cleovelvet group is now four cats!

"Good morning, and welcome to CNN (Cat News Network)".

Dateline: Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

"VELVET & CLEO TAKE ON TWO CATS SLATED FOR DEATH AT SHELTER"

"Today's earth-shaking news. Cleo and Velvet, known far and wide on "Flippy's Cat Page" have taken in two cats to heroically save them from death."

"CNN reports the cats at the mansion are alive and well. Tippy (a 1.5 year old Tabby/Calico mix) and Bella (a 1.5 year old black and white longhair girl) are reported to be fine. We now go to CNN war correspondent Bill Mason... Bill?"

"...Yes, thank you Bill. A late start this morning at the Mason residence, as Cleo the alarm clock has gone on strike, and is pissed off due to being locked out of the bird room since the installation of two new cats there. Sources high up reveal she will remain on strike until the current situation is resolved, and unfortunately for Cleo, this is likely not to happen in her lifetime. One cat, the male tabby, is staying in his new forever home... ah... well... forever. The sooner Cleo gets used to this the better. The two met in a special meeting briefly yesterday.

Insiders report that the meeting between the two was short.

Cleo hissed.

Tippy hissed back.

At this hour, no further details have been released. Bella, the female has been in hiding and not available for an interview. However, upon gaining access to the sequestered room this morning, this reporter saw some of the food was missing, and Tippy made a short statement from the desk.

When petted, he did not run away, but said, and I quote: "Purrr Purrr".

That's about all I have at this hour, Bill, back to you."

"Thank you Bill. CNN will keep you updated as events unfold. Velvet apparently could care less, and is snoring on the bed, dreaming of kitty snacks.

We take you back now to our originally scheduled programming, "The Brady Bunch goes to Mars, and doesn't come back".

Copyright © Bill Mason
January 29, 2002