Flippy's Cat Page - Things Cats Do

THINGS CATS DO

There are some things that cats do on a regular basis, but if we
saw a human doing it we would worry about their mental state.
How many things on the following list can you identify with?

My cat Midnight:
Loves to play hide and seek at the foot of the bed especially when the duvet hangs over (she is camouflaged). As you pass she takes a swipe at you.
Prefers to climb the side of the sofa like its the north face of the eiger rather than jumping on to the seat.
Likes her scratch post but lovvvvves the sofa, bed and the chair more, also using said furniture to pull herself along on her back all the way around.
Is very fond of the laminate flooring.... using it as a skating rink.
Loves to be loved.... on her terms (of course) when she has had enough she will let you know with a quick scratch and bite.
Will only drink from her bowl as a last resort.... the bath, bathroom sink, toilet bowl or kitchen sink provide a much better source of water especially from the tap itself.
Loves water trickling down the side of the bath trying to catch the droplets as they fall while moaning at them for going too fast for her to catch.
Has a fascination for water going down the drain hole and will stare for hours at it!
Loves to chase rolled up pieces of paper and pushes them under the chair to form a nice congregation of paper balls. Of course all spiders, moths and other insects take precedent over the afore mentioned paper balls.
Will eat anything as long as it's something she has found - whether it's animal, vegetable or mineral is immaterial.
Will stare endlessly out of the window talking funny Hannibal Lecter-esque language at the birds and squirrels that come to visit (purposely to tease her).
Makes it a ritual that anything small and movable be promptly relegated to the floor thus making a mess, noise or both.
Has been up to no good when she flies passed you out of the room at Mach 1 that you are entering.
Uses the cat box as a place solely to build sandcastles with. Said litterbox is used for waste disposal.... only at meal times when guests are around (to enjoy the pungent aroma - with her blessing).
Has so much character and although you have to be a trained lion-tamer to live with her, she gives you endless joy and pleasure.
Leigh-ann Taylor

My cat Booty:
Likes to sit on your lap as soon as you sit down anywhere anytime and will not get off even when you are dying for the loo.
Sleeps on my shoulder at night like a parrot.
Has learned to say no and now - no to doing anything and now for food.
Attacks other cats by using the magnetic cat door only she can get in then when they try she whacks them with the cat door.
Gets in a mood if we don't do the housework on a Saturday
Loves Fridays as she knows at the weekend we are home all day.
Hates Mondays.
Is scared of everything sometimes her own toys.
Likes brown toast.
Likes whatever you are having for tea and paws you until you give her some.
Eats food with her feet except for mash potato which she waits for you to wipe off her paw you have about 10 seconds then she gives up and flicks it everywhere.
Loves chicken cooked on George Foreman with loads of garlic but not on a BBQ.
Wops your ankles for food.
Likes dens.
Is scared or birds.
Eats spiders after pulling their legs off.
Jumps up your chest to be carried downstairs for breakfast with her arms wrapped round your neck.
Loves to eat cake especially Sayers Dinky cakes and will fight you for them.
Says hello when you get home and wags her tail very quickly - she does this when she is excited or is fed chicken or cake.
Joanna Horton

My cat Gracie:
Paws the ground while she drinks any water -- out of your glass or hers. We think she may have been raised on a farm...this is a horse thing. Also, she acts like a goat; will eat many different things, like plastic.
Is obsessed with drinking water. All water is hers.
Claims the largest chair as her own... all chairs are hers, though.
Climbs up the back of my computer chair, until she reaches my shoulder, then taps me *on* the shoulder, and meows in my ear. So darn CUTE!
Bites my elbows (gently) if that tapping me on the shoulder thing doesn't work. Then, she meows again.
Rests on the ground with her front paws curled under, so her arms look like 'bat wings'.
Is endlessly fascinated with that printer thing that makes all that noise...
Greets me at the door, often with a littany of things to tell me about her day. The later I get home from work, the more she has to tell me...
Loves thunderstorms. Will sit in fascination for hours, watching rain and snow.
Loves romaine lettuce. And parmesan cheese. In fact, an entire caesar salad is her dream of a good meal...
Will give kisses on the face if asked. Often uses these kisses as reason to give her more romaine lettuce.
Will also play 'hide and seek' and 'It' with you. God, she's so CUTE!
Has the funniest "meow" ever; you can talk to her (meow at her) and she will meow back!
Cannot resist my wool scarf; it's her blankie now. She must knead it, no matter what the time, no matter what the place...
Jennifer Willett

My cat Derek Jeter:
Loves to sit on my lap when I play video games.
Licks my head when I am sleeping.
Meows like crazy whenever I go to the bathroom.
Chases a laser pointer for HOURS on end.
Sleeps on his back.
Sits on the couch like a person.
Doesn't like people food, except for Burger King french fries and a rare Dorrito.
Sleeps on my feet.
Will slap my wife's bottom and stay there until she plays with him.
Bookermps

My cat Clemintine:
Loves to sleep ontop my feet and keep me warm.
Loves to watch my fish Dion swimming in his tank.
Loves to drool all over her favorite pillow when I cover it in catnip.
Cries when I go anywhere without her i.e bathroom.
Sits at the door when I leave the house and scratches it.
Loves to clean her mean sister Valentine even though she knows Valentine will attack her.
Loves a big slice of turkey.
Loves to lick pictures for some strange reason.
Loves being loved.
Katie Wendt

My cat Honey:
Smiles and licks you, has bad breath.
Licks the toothpaste and tries to run away when I try to brush her teeth.
When I try to clip her nails she runs away.
Likes to sit on the satellite box because it is warm, she licks it and the TV or wooden furniture.
She meows after she goes in the litter box so I know to clean it out.
She bites my leg or feet when I am eating at the kitchen table.
She always wants to go outside day or night.
She doesn't like the cold, so she begs to go inside by pawing the door.
She always wants us to brush her hair.
She will try to eat the brush.
She likes to play with the plastic rings around the milk bottles.
If you toss it up in the air she jumps very high, does a dance, and catches it with great accuracy. Then I clap and she does it much better, even climb the walls.
She goes limp then stretches when I pick her up.
She sleeps all day. When she wakes up she stretches and uses her scratching post.
She likes to jump in the basket with the bills in it and knock it down.
She also likes to eat fake Christmas trees.
If I go in my room and shut the door, she will meow to come in.
When you enter the house she will greet you and then fall down on her back.
She meows when my husband isn't home. She can hear things outside, like a watch cat.
Denise

My cat Georgie:
Talks all the time! I swear she can say 'Hello' just like the monkey in Aladdin.
Brings in 'prizes' for her mummy
Has a fascination with leaves at the moment, she will bring one in meowing as if she is in pain and then drop the leaf at your feet...
Brings leaves in at silly hours in the morning (4:00AM!) and once she drops the leaf she will go back out and come back in 5 minutes later talking all the way up the stairs into my bedroom to put the leaf on my pillow!!
Goes crazy when she has catnip!
Talks to the birds outside with a kind of 'yak, yak, yak' (a clicky sound!)
Looks like a snake when she is being sneaky.

My cat Callie:
'Pad pads' me and does strange movements whilst padding me!
Talks constantly.
Is not good when he wants his dinner.
Slaps the dog but doesn't use his claws!
Rolls on the floor with his paws up!
Sue George

My cat Nimbus:
is a very good mouser.
loves to drink from the sink when I am brushing my teeth.
likes to push the french door open to the bathroom while I am showering
loves her best pug friends, Moxie and Bella
loves to type on chew on my books when I am writing a paper.
has a jingly blinging collar that her bling-tastic aunt gave her that jingles when she moves anywhere (she hates it).
has romantic interests in a classics major.
will fetch.
Susannah

My cat:
Lays in the lavender bush and smells lovely
Wakes me up at 4:00AM to go outside, but comes back inside to use the litter tray
Re-wakens me at 6:00AM for tucker
Plays soccer with a small plastic ball but doesn't play fair as he will pick it up and carry it off somewhere if I get too many touches
Sits in his outdoor pen enclosure even though there is now no need for it - (we used to live in a busy area so it was used to give him outdoor access in safety)
Feeds from a dinner plate - (he used to hook his meat out of his bowl onto the floor with his claw and I got sick of cleaning up a mess)
Attacks anything bare - feet, arms, legs, shoulders - but won't attack if I have them covered.
Shas

My cat:
Likes to sleep on top of the computer
Cries at night when I don't let her in my room
Licks the Dr Pepper drink when you're not looking
Tries to chase cats from inside the house
Drags her butt on the carpet when she is to lazy to move to a different sleeping position
Attacks me when I try to sleep
Licks my nose
Scratches the furniture
Trips you when she's hungry
Attacks stuffed animals (especially black cat stuffed animals)
Bob Jacobs

My cat Jesse:
Growls when you try to take his toy away
Chases anything that you throw but never brings it back
Peeks under the couch and stove waiting for you to retrieve his toy then loses it under there again
Kneads for about an hour, lays down for two minutes, and then leaves
Goes full-run to the window in the kitchen above the counter and attacks the window
Likes to attack and eat spiders (love him for that)
Will eat anything on the ground (hate him for that)
Always has to be under something (then attacks your feet)
Will attack you for a treat
Loves to chase the laser pointer
Can turn off light switches because he jumps soooo high
Is terrified of the remote control car - he hisses and spits and smacks it really hard
Plays hide and sneak with me. He will come to look for me and we play chase up and down the stairs
Likes to sleep in the sink.
He has no dexterity - whenever he jumps up onto anything he falls and/or and manages to knock everything over!

My cat Casey:
Has to be on the desk while I am using the computer
Lays on my hand while I am using the mouse
Makes the weirdest meow noise when he is in one of his moods
Follows my husband everywhere at night. He has his own little spot to sleep in and always has to have some part of his body touching my husband.
If my husband has his back to him in bed Casey will move so he is in front of him again
When you pet him under his chin for a while, then stick your finger near his mouth he will open his mouth a little to chew (like a nibble) on your finger
Meows (cries) like crazy if my husband is on the other side of the door
If he gets outside (we are holding him) he tries to worm his way to the grass to eat it
Is terrified of the vaccum cleaner (doesn't care about the remote control car)
Loves to crawl behind the shades no matter how many times we tell him not to.
Will only listen to my husband when he is on the counter or table to get off
Kelly Vance

My cats:
Tag team me when I am trying to go up or down the stairs (all 14 of them…stairs, that is)
Watch carefully to see which human might be going to sit where, and beat them to that piece of furniture.
“Mrow” loudly until SOMEONE turns on the faucet for a drink or paw dipping.
Have been known to jump into toilet because they’re in such a hurry to bounce off of it to the counter, thereby not realizing said toilet lid is not down.
Love the smell of whatever I am cleaning the sink with and roll in ecstasy all over kitchen counter – rather orgasmic. (Note: they do not get to touch cleaner – that would hurt kitties).
Suckle the back of my neck, crook of arm, sheet, blanket, t-shirt, whatever is handy, while loudly purring and kneading. Then fall abruptly to sleep and leave me soaking wet and wide awake. Said behavior needs to stop or humans will have to ban said kitten from bedroom until said kitten is ten years old.
Are wonderful, loving and funny companions and are loved beyond measure.
Beth Campbell

My cat Rizzo:
Will only drink from a running tap.
Chews green olives then will roll over them with his head.
Retrieves small articles when thrown.
Leaves various small articles in my shoes.
Brings me frogs, mice and worms, always still alive, then drops them at my feet.
Runs to the front door when the doorbell rings.
Runs to the phone when the telephone rings.
Will sit or lay down when told.
Will always touch you with his paw when he sits next to anyone.
Growled like a dog when I had an intruder!
Jo Waters

My Seal-Point Birman kitten:
Beats me to my computer chair.
Snores in my ear and when he finally stops he breaths really heavily... really annoying!
He always has to rest his head on some part of you (putting all his weight down).
Loves to be carried like a baby.
Prefers to be held over your shoulder with his head resting on your shoulder.
Carries his toys around the apartment in his mouth.
Loves to attack jeans (haven't figured out why).
Meows for treats.
Goes into his litterbox for the fun of just digging... not even going to the bathroom!
Likes to slide and do 360's on the kitchen floor.
Is not a morning kitty.
Likes to run after me and trip me up!
Absolutely loves dogs!

My 2-year-old Tortoiseshell moggy cat:
Is a THIEF! She steals everything she can carry... such as: Metal kitchen sink drains, jewelry, mail, pens, her leach, flip flops, etc.
She must think of herself as a better alarm clock than the actual thing because she continually pounces on you to wake up... on her terms!
Will not go to bed unless both my boyfriend and I are both in bed, she will sit outside the door or down the hallway (if he's home) and meow until he comes upstairs!
Waps the last leg that enters the shower.
Loves the shower and paddles around in the water and licks it up after I am done showering!
When she can't find me, I swear she says, "MMeeeeOOOOmmmmm!!!
Stacey

My cat:
Scratches at the windows, wanting out.
Kills innocent animals and brings them to me thinking I could cook them and feed them to him.
Bites my toes when he is hungry.
Opens cupboard doors and lays on clean towels.
Steals pillows to sleep on.
Drinks out of the toilet instead of his water bowl.
Has keen ears when I open cans of tuna, he comes out and persists that I give him some.
Heather

My cat, Zoob:
Burrows under dirty clothes, ie T-shirts & shorts etc, and (thankfully not underwear) and carries around on back like turtle shell to redistribute clothing evenly through the house.
Drags food bowl to desired dining venue of the evening even if that is the window sill.
Demands to know every thing to do with food supply in the household.
Gives advice on where said food supply should be stored mostly access able to him.
Only licks the other cats paw pads, ears and nether region, but with the same diligence as all-round cleaning.
Pushes offending items off the computer desk by repeatedly head-butting said them.
Is in cahoots with the sock monster stealing and hiding one sock from a pair, God knows where.
Licks and nibbles my thumb or little finger just before drifting off to sleep for the big nighttime nap.
Love me and the other cat, Zen, unconditionally but especially if food is involved.

My cat, Zen:
Drinks from water glass beside bed.
Given the opportunity, knocks over any other glass in the house.
Pretends to be a dice by throwing himself onto the middle of any board game.
Steals scrabble letters and plays soccer with them.
Monopolizes the ironing board.
Sleeps under the covers only if his head can be outside.
Convinces all the neighbors that he is underfed and cold thus gaining entry to their homes.
Sticks his head into my riding boots and wears them like a hat.
Leaves presents in form of toys inside shoes, which toys are found when putting shoes on.
Curls up around Zoob at night to keep him warm.
Hogs the heater and does not allow Zoob near it.
Allows Zoob to eat his dinner after Zoob has already polished off his own meal.
Jo Drake

My cat April:
Attacks the air.
Snores when sleeping.
Wants food at 2:00AM.
Loves peacock feathers.
Eats lizards
Goes in a ball and backs up when I try to pick her up.
Will not use any cat bed except a pillow inside a trash can lid.
Climbs onto the roof of the neighbors house and then can't get down.
Is afraid of bugs.
Eats anything she finds on the ground.
Loves to hide under rugs.
Samara

My cats:
Insist on getting into the sink... and leaving cat hair round it.
Think the computer is a nice warm place to sit.
Sleep in many different places in order to strew fur as far as possible.
Demands attention when you have no time... and "vants to be alone" when you do... but never complains (much).
Wakes you up before the alarm clock with demands for snuggles and breakfast... except for that time you forget to alarm the clock so are late for work.
Paddles round the water in the bottom of the shower and then wonders why its paws are wet.
Think: "Why use a scratch post when there is a perfectly good sofa provided?"
Are completely adorable and irreplaceable.
Anonymous

My cat:
Fetches like a dog and growls like a dog and eats like a dog and craps like a dog ... I swear he is a cat-dog!
Anonymous

Tanger jumps into shower with me.
Sheba vigorously licks mu hair dry after shower all the time meowing her disapproval at me getting wet in the first place, accented with a few nips and slaps.
Brenda L 'Ecuyer

My cat Harry...
Loves green olives but will only play with black ones.
Knows that every time I stand up from wherever I am (couch, toilet, bed, chair, etc...) that if he whines and runs for his cat room that I will give him his favorite treat: WHISKAS cat food with gravy.
Loves to follow me around the house wherever I go winding himself in between my legs and "rowling" with love.
Even sits in the window and watches me garden on the side of the house, and then when I move to the front, he finds a corresponding window that he can keep an eye on me from.
Loves to paw water from his water dish until it is all on the floor, and then whine for more water. I got smart and put a pan underneath his dish and he hasn't figured out to paw that one yet.
Loves to sit on the back of the computer chair when I am there and knead the back of my neck.
Will not sit with me and cuddle unless I catch him on "his terms".
Will sleep pretty much anywhere that I have been.
Hates my husband.
Tries to lure me into the living room at exactly 9:00PM every night for a belly and a back scratch in front of the couch. He's never late!
Will not sleep anywhere but on my feet and it's sooooooo annoying.
Looks at me with those trusting, squinting eyes that say "I love you", and I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I smacked him on the butt one morning because he tried to wake me for food and I don't think he's forgiven me yet.
Likes to crawl under the covers only in the morning, and only if there's a breathing hole for him to look out.
Won't eat raw meat.
Likes to think he's a "big boy" when I let him sit out on the front porch at night with me in the summer time.
Comes when he's called by caterwauling all the way down the hallway and says "I'm coming, I'm coming".
Lets out a little "brrrrrrght" when I pet him when he's sleeping, or if I come into the room he's sleeping in, just so I know that He's there.
Will only do a silent meow for me.
Likes to lay on his back with his head twisted around by his feet and stare up at me upside down and squint his eyes. Complete and total trust.
Bolts when he sees my husband coming, but will flop down on the floor when he sees me, or make a run for his cat room...
Sounds like he's saying "moooooom" when he meows for treats.
Cher Winter

Abigail helps herself, opening the cupboard and getting out a bag of goldfish crackers to munch on when I eat ice cream in front of her.
Jeff Chan

My cat:
Wakes me up 5 minutes before the alarm goes off (and does it constantly after I have punched the SNOOZE button).
Screams after an outdoor cat gets hurt and sulks for 2 hours afterwards.
Refuses to eat anything with a dark brown colour.
Jason Cordier

My cat:
Loves green and black olives (careful with non-pitted). It was found out when he intently lapped up olive juice before it was mixed into martinis.
Holds play object in mouth and with a flick of his neck throws the object into the air then tries to catch it with both paws.
When I'm typing at the computer, he tries to sit on one of my forearms and place his paws on my other wrist.
When feeling mischevious, unrolls toilet paper into a neat pile on the floor. Then he may or may not play with it until not-so-neatly shredded.
Every once in a while scoots water bowl next to food bowl and splashes water into food then eats even though the only food he has ever eaten is lamb or salmon dry Eukanuba.
Likes to walk on guests sitting on the couch...the same guests who he will not let near him for petting.
Attacks the heel of my last foot to enter the shower right as it goes over the edge of the tub. He know's I will be leaving soon after taking my shower and watches me get ready with a longing stare.
If a noise disturbs him while sleeping he slightly picks up his head and with eyes half open let's out a "do not disturb me" grunt/groan. He will also do this if you try to pet or touch him while he sleeps. He does not make this sound in any other situation.
Simon Belmont

My cat:
Races to the computer so he can get the chair before I get it.
Says "Burr-ee".
Has to sit on top of the news paper when I read it
Won't sit on my lap until he has pressed his paws up and down for five minutes.
Trips you while you go down the stairs to get your attention for food.
Sheilcon

My cat:
Jumps up on the kitchen counter and eats the pie that is cooling (with entire face in the pan...)
Poops in your shoes when you go on vacation. (But we don't do that anymore, FREDRICK!)
Attacks a sock puppet on the floor by shredding it to pieces
Walks across your keyboard while you're typinggggkikko8098 FREDRICK!!! (I guess that's pay back for the poop-shoe thing...)
FlamingKitty91

My cat:
Retrieves dish cloths from kitchen cabinet and leaves them all over the house.
Insists on sprawling on top of all reading material while it's being read.
Curls paw and scoops out water from bowl leaving carpet dripping wet.
Curls paw and eats "goodies" one at a time by bringing them to his mouth with paw.
Anything sitting on the edge of tables, desks, etc. is fair game to be batted over the edge, especially glasses full of liquid.
Rolls over on his back so owner can buckle his leash when getting ready for a walk outside.
Tries desperately to catch moths through the glass window at night.
Talks in a special language . . . aaaa rump!
Rita Brannen

My cat:
Asks for food and runs away as soon as the plate is put down.
Asks again for food as soon as Mum puts it away then repeats number one.
Tries to grab Mum's Rosary beads.
Will steal anything, including an earring out of my ear when I'm asleep.
Runs through the house talking very loudly just for fun.
Climbs on all the furniture.
Climbs wire door.
Runs away and stops looking through wire door if the birds come close but until then threatens them with murder in the first degree.
Wakes Mummy up several times each night.
Claws all the furniture and refuses to use scratching post.
Comes when he's called (only the second cat I've ever known to do that).
Bites when I try to clip knots from his coat (he's a Persian).
Sits by the refrigerator and meows when he's hungry.
Sits beside his litter box and meows if he thinks it needs changing (likes it changed after each time he uses it).
Sits at front door and meows when he wants the wooden door open so he can look out.
Sits at back door and meows when he wants to look out (usually in the middle of winter and there's snow on Mount Buller and we get the wind chill down here).
Has a love affair with any shoes that are made of leather regardless of whether someone is wearing them or not.
Dislikes most people and hides when they visit.
Will walk over me if he's going somewhere even if it means going out of his way to do it.
Hits me when I sing.
Meows loudly if I go to the bathroom until I answer him, then he comes in and tries to steal the toilet paper.
Loves to play swordpaws (hitting a piece of paper I hold out for him).
refuses to play chase and get some exercise.
Loves to slide across the dining room table and scratch the top.
Loves his Mum.
Hates the Vet.
Hates being in a car because he believes he's going to the Vet.
Knows he's the most wonderful, gorgeous, adorable, beautiful, intelligent, loving, special, perfect cat in my entire universe.
Grace Tolson

My cat:
When I give the "potty, go outside" command for the dogs, runs to the back door in case there is a chance to sneak out.
When refrigerator door is opened, runs and puts paws on the bottom shelf. Mews for snacks.
When dishwasher door is opened, jumps on the door and tries to lick dirty dishes. If clean dishes are found, lick anyway.
Jumps on toilet and falls into toilet bowl - several times a week.
Climbs up on furniture. Leaps onto unsuspecting passers-by.
Rolls around on the floor with dog. Bites the dog's ears. Bats the dog's tail. Curls up and sleeps with the dog all day.
Sarah Andrews

My cat:
Eats anything green, whether it's cut flowers, grass (brought in from outside or grown especially for them by an indulgent mom), lettuce or vegetable trimmings.
Follow me into the bathroom and expect to be patted.
Sleep on my back or chest at night and drool on my neck.
Chase the wrinkles in the sheets when I'm changing the bedding, then hide under the covers.
Drink water from the far edge of the bowl so it splatters everywhere.
Knock over any unattended glass or cup, to see the liquid spill out. If it's milk, they put their paws in it first.
All use the same litter box, even though there are four boxes available.
Demand attention, especially if another cat is getting some.
Insist on lying on my arm at night, or when I'm trying to read.
Sleep on top of the floor vents when the furnace is running.
Chase any toy for the 30 seconds it takes to lose it under the couch, refrigerator, stove, etc.
Get in horrible snarling fights that make mom come running, then instantly stop and look at her like she's the one with the problem.
Demand to be on the other side of any door, especially if that door isn't opened very often.
Eat flies, wasps, moths, spiders or any insect they can catch.
Magically disappear when they see mom coming with the cat carrier.
Eat all the cat food if they get to the bowl first, then regurgitate shortly afterwards.
Climb in the dryer when I open it to take out the nice warm clothes.
Put their face in my face when I'm sleeping so their whiskers go up my nose.
Colleen Duggan

My cat:
Must drink out of an old fashioned glass placed on vanity in bathroom... will push to the edge of the vanity short of going over the edge, when she feels it is too empty... usually just as one gets all comfy in bed for the night.
Flips the pages of a book or news paper when I am trying to sleep.
Uses the same corner in litter box when there are three other corners to use.
Plays fetch only when she wants to... usually in the middle of the night.
Loves to cuddle... with her butt in your face... lovely to wake up to.
Likes freshly washed and hair-sprayed hair... I think she is almost orgasmic... when it comes to it... not sure what she is going to do to you.
Will cuddle only for a bit... then you are on your own. Do not press your luck - she is ruthless when she wants to be.
Opens cupboard doors and drawers, sits in them for a bit and then leaves, leaving guest to believe the house is haunted as this occurs mostly at night.
Lynda Gibson

My cat, Penelope:
Jumps from the floor onto the back of my computer chair while I'm working at the PC. This results in spinning the chair around about 90 degrees as she scrambles for footing, simultaneously knocking anything sitting on the edge of the bed (next to the computer desk) onto the floor. She does this 3 or 4 times per day. Drives me nuts!
Tim Gerchmez

My cat:
Covers the food bowl up with the rug.
"Barks" at the birds.
Picks up dry cat food morsel in her mouth, drops in water bowl, stirs, scoops with paw, and eats!
Fetchs or plays hockey with the milk lid seal.
Runs to the food bowl to eat every time one of the others does.
At bedtime guards the cat room door because if you keep the others out, you won't have to go to bed!
Drags her bottom on the carpet if it itches.
Melanie Manera

My cat:
Cries at the bedroom door at 4:00AM.
Chases things that are not there.
Runs around the house cooing.
Attacks you for no apparent reason.
Takes a big mouthful of food to eat over the rug and then loose half of the food.
Nate

My cat:
Climbs up Daddy's body if he refuses to pet him.
Licks Daddy's hair when he's trying to sleep or working on the computer.
Sits on the sink and wait for mom to pet him every time she walks near the bathroom.
Licks the shower curtain after anyone has taken a bath.
Sits on the lap of anyone on the toilet, no one must be alone!
Bats mom in the face, time to get up and feed us!
Chases the dog through the house, we will not tolerate dog cleaning our bums!
Hides in the closet and sheds on black clothing.
Eats any bread whether it be in plastic wrap or not.
Watches TV (favorite is Animal Planet).
Curls up around mom's head for the night.
Exfoliates mom's face with tongue.
Chews on Dad's chin.
Is utterly loveable and unforgettable.
Mechele de Avila

My cat:
Sleeps on a hard place all the time - on my shelf in the laundry room. (Must be comfortable!)
Puts her foot in her water dish while eating.
Puts her litter in a pile as she uses it.
Attacks my Christmas lights.
Attacks the fridge.
Shreds whole rolls of toilet paper.
Tries to KILL me with her balls she places them in a row in the bathroom every night when I am in bed hoping that I will fall down.
Heather V.

My cat:
Runs to the door and climbs my me so he can sit on my shoulder and look when somebody knocks on the door.
Plays hide and seek behind the bed.
Connie

My cat:
Sits on human slaves chest, right up in under their chin, with her back to the person (no matter that they aren't a kitten anymore and the human slave can't see or breathe with all that fur in their face).
Wants to go in and out every five minutes no matter what weather or time of day or night. Even better if human slave has just sat down.
Is determined to sleep on the pillow with you at night and if you don't wake up to her being there, she will continue to slap you lightly with her paw until you wake up and move for her.
Meows in your face when you are sleeping to try to wake you, and until you do she grooms the hair on your head as if it were her own hair.
Comes running the second you shake a cat treat bag.
Has to be in the restroom with you anytime you go in there and if you are using the bathroom she has to sit on the toilet seat with you and wait for you to flush to watch the water go down the drain.
Refuses to eat out of her food bowl, has to knock pieces on the mat with her foot and eat a few and then play with the rest.
Likes to stick her foot in the water bowl and play with it and lick her paws when they get wet. She loves to put food into the bowl as well and have a huge food pile soaked next to the water bowl.
Loves to fetch with any toys you toss for her to go after.
Loves to lay on any paperwork you have out on the table.
Karen

My cat:
Sits in front of my humans dinner plate, veeerrrrrry slowly stretch out right paw and attempt to swat chop bone off the plate. It is most important whilst doing this to avoid eye contact by looking in the opposite direction cause then you are invisible and the human doesn't know what you are trying to do!
Hides under the sheets and leaps out when my human comes to bed.
Eats dinner paw-ful by paw-ful - takes 10 times as long as eating straight from the bowl and is much more fun.
Swats biccies into the water bowl and then refuses to drink from it, instead drinks from puddles left in the bath or shower.
Sits on top of the microwave and looks upside-down through the glass and hopes that whatever is in there is "FOR ME!"
Angelika Mueller

Saying "Hail Mary's"! At night, after he tucks us in, our cat Boscoe, carries one of his toys around the house. With the toy in his mouth, he does the rounds of each room and meow. It sounds like he's saying "Hail Mary? Hail Mary?" with the pitch going up at the end. It's really a hoot!
Susan Chess

Every night, I have a chip and mint ice cream cone. I first eat off the chocolate chips from the top and then have to give my cat, Mad Maxx, the cone to lick. He usually takes 5 or 6 licks off and then is happy and I get to finish it!
My other baby, Squeekie, loves to sleep above my pillow, purring at a 6.5 on the Richter scale until I go to sleep!
I seriously believe my babies have set up a laser device at the doorway to the kitchen. I cant go into the kitchen without them knowing. I have tested this theory. I swung one leg through the doorway, and, POOF! there they were, running down the hall at me at top speed.
When I use the bathroom, one cat has to be in there with me. The other one lays on the other side of the door and they play paw tag under the door with each other.
Can someone tell me what is in my closets that the cats absolutely, desperately NEED to get in there to see?
Trina Donaghy

When the humans of the household are about to go on holiday, make them as nervous as possible about leaving by going to the toilet on carpets, chewing on the few pot plants still left in the flat, hiding in the luggage... When the humans come back, repeat the procedure to make sure they never leave again. The following night, wake the humans up every half an hour to check that they're still there.
Lie on a human's chest with forepaws on sensitive parts of their anatomy, and proceed to pretend that the human is a Mommy Cat and the delicious sweater they are wearing will give milk if sufficiently sucked and kneaded.
When petted, drool copiously and purr 4.2 on the Richter scale.
Climb up pants legs at the sight of a can of tuna.
Get grey cat hair all over visitors' fancy clothes in a sudden fit of affection.
Shed fur. Shed more fur. Shed even more fur. Fur, shed. Shed some further fur. Furry up everything in living space by shedding. Shed-shed-shed-fur-fur-fur. Smile and shed fur.
Ask to be picked up, but complain loudly when the human complies. However, after being petted for half a minute, go into an ecstatic trance and purr hugely.
Participate in any human hobby by lying down on it.
Prefer to fish tidbits out of a deep mug instead of eating them out of a bowl - more fun! Or alternatively, in the case of the dimmer cat in the household, fail to understand how the tidbits can be retrieved from the mug.
Take up half the bed although only one tenth of the mass of each human - then stretch disarmingly to make it morally impossible for the humans to reclaim their territory.
Refuse to eat anything with chicken in it, unless it also has tuna.
Auri Poso

My cat:
Sits in front of the refrigerator at any time a human is in the kitchen, begging for milk, and then turns her nose up, refusing to drink it.
Runs upstairs, sticks her paws under the door to torment the dog when she knows that my Moms dog can't stand her.
Insists on biting, attacking and licking any body part left outside of the covers while I am in a very deep sleep. If that fails, she will climb under the blankets to attack!
Suddenly decides to chase her tail round in circles, claws extended while sitting on my lap.
Sleeps with her paws curled around my arm, neck, leg, etc.
Cuddles with me and purrs every night until I fall asleep.
Rachel

My cat:
Bestows extra special loving attention on my cat-hating Mother-In-Law.
Greets guests by sticking their butts in people's faces.
Insists on climbing into the washing machine.
Poops in the most inaccessible corner behind the TV purely to express displeasure.
Hooks scraps out of the kitchen bin rather than eat the food in their bowls.
Defecates noisily and pungently in the litterbox when you have guests for dinner, dig deeply and at length in the kitty litter but fail to cover up deposit, saunter into the dining room with kitty litter stuck between their toes and try to climb onto a guest's lap. Especially if she is the asthmatic one wearing ivory satin. (My cats are black.)
Decides your visit to the toilet should be a communal one and cry loudly at the bathroom door until you let them in.
Investigates the contents of the fridge by actually climbing into the fridge.
Licks my bare legs while I am cleaning my teeth in the morning.
Lavender

Instead of bringing in dead, mostly dead or half dead play things, bringing me leaves as they know I am a vegetarian. They meow quite loudly and proudly to alert me to their presents, too.
Waking me up in the middle of the night by sucking on my ear lobes.
Giving their own, performance art interpretations of Mission Impossible 2 scenes (in particular the slow motion ones of Tom Cruise and the bad guy leaping off moving objects and flying through the air towards each other).
Dribbling with pleasure when they have their tummies rubbed.
Turning up their noses at REALLY good cat food (I have been found, on occasions, sobbing in the cat food aisle of the supermarket as there is no food that they are "happy" with at that particular moment in time).
Lying to my partner by claiming that I haven't fed them, I never feed, them, they are STARVING, please feed us...
Fairlie McMullen

My cat always gets jealous if I'm having my hair played with - she wants a rub too!
She will only drink water from the bath tap and not from her bowl.
Stays in bed with you as long as you am there.
Comforts you when you are feeling low or ill.
Sits and waits behind the door to greet you when she knows you are coming home.
Will only go out in the garden if I am with her - she's a big baby.
Climbs into bed whatever time of day and whatever the weather - she tucks herself in.
Alex Packham

My cat:
Comes into the bathroom while I'm there.
Asks for more food when she doesn't really want it.
Sleeps in twelve different places.
Licks you while you are sleeping.
Opens cabinets and get stuck in them.
Drinks water from the fish bowl.
Stephanie E.

Greet new friends by having a hearty sniff of their nether regions.
Bathe with our tongues.
Eat out of a bowl on the floor.
Make it known that we just had a very satisfying potty break by running spastically from one end of the house to the other.
Chatter and meow at things that no one else can see.
Have great fun tossing and chasing the tab from a milk jug.
Take a drink from the toilet.
Rebecca Parkin

Hang out on the tops of furniture and the refrigerator.
Stick their faces in a person's plate.
Demand that someone entertain them.
Lay across a newspaper or book and expect attention.
Hiss and growl at a strange member of their species.
Hazel Az

Rub one's whole body around the cook's legs.
Ask for the door to be opened and then decide you didn't want to go out or come in anyway.
Fay Foster

Go sit on a human slaves chest, right up in under their chin their back to the person (no matter that they aren't a kitten anymore and the human slave can't see or breathe with all that fur in their face).
Sit and stare with big round hungry eyes at human slaves while they are sitting in front of TV eating dinner.
When human slave is heading to kitchen for any reason (even laundry or the phone) impede progress by meowing loudly and intertwining self between legs of slave and tripping them. Then run on ahead to show them what you wanted them to get you in the first place.
Come running every time a can opener is used or a fridge door is opened.
Want to go in and out every five minutes no matter what weather or time of day or night. Even better if human slave has just sat down.
Bring human slave a token of affection consisting of either almost dead, semi-dead, or just plain running-around-not-dead thing and place it at their feet.
Be lovable with everybody in household but act like all strangers are evil and claw, bite, hiss if picked up to meet them. Do this especially if you have never be abused before, but to everybody that visits make it look like you have been.
Nancy

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