1. Pet the cat!
2. Attempt to read the paper without a tail in my face.
3. Clean up the spill on the floor where kitty played in her waterbowl.
4. Convince kitty the world does not revolve around her.
5. Scrub kitty's nose prints off the windows.
6. Snuggle with kitty and take a cat-nap.
7. Teach kitty to tell time by my clock, not hers.
8. Convince kitty there is a speed limit in the house.
9. Play the string game with kitty.
10. Show kitty that the can I am opening is a can of beans.
11. Explain to kitty that bizarre behaviour is not allowed at 4:00AM.
12. Spend an hour at twilight sitting beside Selena watching the cottontail bunny rabbit eat my newly planted garden. But she enjoyed watching that rabbit just too much for me to run it off. (by Julie Cook)
13. Convince kitty that offering her stinky butt to my guests as a way of greeting is not considered polite in the human world. (by Paula K.)
14. Try to keep the wild fauna (beetles, frogs, lizards, geckos, snakes, moths, butterflies, etc.) *outside* the house, despite kitty's insistence in bringing them in to share with you. (by Victor M. Martinez, Jr.)
15. Turn on bathroom faucet to a fine, gentle stream, so kitty can get a drink of fresh water without splashing her face. (Don't forget to turn faucet off, when kitty is done drinking!) (by Nancy & Mark Lemmon)
16. Learn to type with one hand because kitty believes that at least one hand should be free to pet him, or for him to sit on, at all times. (by Jan Russell)
17. Buy a larger bed because there isn't room for you, kitty *and* your husband to sleep in it all at once. (by Jan Russell)
18. Convince kitty that artificial flowers/plants are *not* edible. (by Jan Russell)
19. Clean up mess on rug where kitty barfed up artificial flowers/plants. (by Jan Russell)
20. Wear an old sweater because kitty looks so sweet smurgling on your new chenille one that you just laid out on the bed while you put your shoes on. (by Jan Russell)
21. Convince kitty that meals on plates on the table, eaten with knife and fork, are for human consumption, not feline. (by Jan Russell)
22. Train husband to be devoted cat slave. (by Jan Russell)