Several Thanksgivings ago I had not thought to defrost a rather large frozen turkey purchased for the occasion ahead of time, so was forced to place it in water, in the stainless steel kitchen sink, to defrost overnight on Thanksgiving Eve.

On arising about 5:00AM, I staggered into kitchen and found that Blind Terrorist Rowdy - by far the largest and strongest of our cats - had dragged said turkey up, out of sink, over counter, and then down to floor aided by his sneaky cohorts the Evil Three Others. They were all enjoying an early cat Thanksgiving of raw turkey entree on the kitchen floor!

Oliver was *inside* the carcass, eating his way out of where you'd put the stuffing (Oliver is the smallest). The others had gnawed off wings, legs, and *NO ONE* looked the slightest bit guilty. I could not punish them, but I know to this day Rowdy is the only one strong enough to pull a 20# turkey UP and OUT of a deep sink full of water alone. The cavity was crowded with both Oliver and the giblets package in the stuffing cavity.

Luckily in our area, supermarkets are open at 7:00AM on holidays for the most part, so off I went to buy a ham, which tasted just as good as a turkey would have. Or so we said. The cats, however, were absolutely bulging, and happy to have had an ill-gotten holiday treat.

Moral of true tale: don't tempt cats with forbidden feasts after cover of dark or when their hoomins turn their backs: whichever happens first!

Copyright © and printed with permission of the author
May 31, 2001